Pause for a moment and listen to opinionated or narrow-minded people you know. Listen to them tell others why they are far more qualified to give one-sided versions of a topic than other people hold. Notice the put downs and attacks that fall like pellets in a hail storm?
You’ll likely hear choice words such as bogus or ridiculous to describe any differing view. Not surprisingly, opinionated people who comment online, rarely leave names or other ID beside their terrible tone tactics. Hmmm.
While it’s true that opinionated people can also be highly specialized in their fields, it’s also true that they have few skills to engage other people’s views in order to learn from the other side. My own love for research leaves me understanding a thing more clearly when I look at it’s opposite hues and shapes through other people’s eyes. Have you noticed that too?
People who diminish opposing views also tend to cause flame wars. They tend to truncate discussions that could lead to amazing understanding from deeper and wider angles across different minds.
Research helps us to discover and support with specific examples… rather than defend our views and attack others. Great team players tend to avoid polemics in favor of reflecting on interesting opposites, in ways that generate a new whole with facts from both sides.
Here are topics with interesting, supportable opposing viewpoints
|
TOPIC |
One view |
Opposing view |
|
1. Education |
Back to basics |
Brain based |
|
2. Sports |
Paid fairly |
Paid unfairly |
|
3. Politics |
Builds community |
Erodes groups |
|
4. Media |
Represents most |
Represents few |
|
5. Depression |
Treat with drugs |
Without drugs |
|
6. Immigrants |
Great asset |
Not an asset |
|
7. College |
Necessary |
Overrated |
|
8. Salaries |
Fair for most |
Unfair for most |
|
9. Family |
Helps most kids |
Hinders many |
|
10. Healthcare |
Fair to most |
Unfair to most |
|
11. Weightloss |
More diets |
Less diets |
|
12. Nature |
Over-stressed |
Under-stressed |
|
13. Animals |
Spay |
Don’t spay |
|
14. Equity |
Growing in US |
Shrunk in US |
|
15. Outsource |
Good idea |
Bad idea |
|
16. Arts |
More emphasis |
Less emphasis |
|
17. Creativity |
Can teach |
Cannot teach |
|
18. Tone |
Can help all |
Cannot help all |
|
19. Birthrates |
Too high |
Too low |
|
20. Intelligence |
IQ is fixed |
IQ is not fixed |
|
21. Friendships |
Easy to keep |
Hard to keep |
|
22. Divorce |
Is a good idea |
Not a good idea |
|
23. Stress |
Good at times |
Always harmful |
|
24. Music |
Should copy free |
No free copies |
|
25. Gender |
Fair treatment |
Unfair |
|
26. Age |
Young preferred |
Aged preferred |
|
27. Power |
From hard work |
From privilege |
In order to extend insights, from ideas you and others put forward, why not start with a question to hear more of what they understand about their view? Or affirm something you seem to share in common. Suggest another angle that person might appreciate. Or better still, why not suggest a project together – that would build from ideas on opposite sides of the issue. Take the tone survey to see how you do with this intrapersonal intelligence.
Any of these suggestions would free people to add their names beside their ideas in online discussion boards. They’d likely also leave you learning from unexpected melodies that tend to come from opposing views of interesting topics. Worth another look at tone tactics that replace flame wars with peace plans to move genius ideas forward together?
Smart Skill 14. Target Agreement in Disagreeable Settings
Smart Skill 15. Target Lessons from Opposing Views
Smart Skill 16. Target Multiple Intelligences – Run from Lectures
Smart Skill 17. Target Teen Talent
Smart Skill 18. Target Brain Cell Regeneration
Smart Skill 19. Target Differences between Gender Brains
Smart Skill 20. Target Neurogenetics of Ethics

on Oct 10th, 2008 at 3:56 pm
Hi Ellen,
We launched a debate website (www.opposingviews.com) on July 24, 2008 and use some of the skill sets you describe to bring intelligent discussion online.
For example, we always post the debate as a question, such as “Are vegetarians healthier?” Or for our Presidential candidates “Who has the better economic plan?” You might be interested in seeing the results.
Terry Whitesides last blog post..Should Religious Symbols be Displayed on Public Property?
on Oct 10th, 2008 at 4:27 pm
Thanks Terry for such a wonderful confirmation that the skills of supporting opposing views work in any civil arena. Great site and congrats on the way you expand the views so far wider than typically seen:-). How refreshing!
More sites like yours would give people a place to see and develop the skills that supports views without attacking people or diminishing insights from the other side.
How do you inspire civility and thoughtful reflections from those who lack tone skills, or are more used to attacking others as a way to emphasize their own ideas?
on Oct 10th, 2008 at 6:17 pm
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Nice site, thanks for information!
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